Recent content by TopTiger

Albert Einstein was a genius, however his brother Frank was a monster.

My wife is fed up with my constant animals puns and has asked me to leave. So I said no problem Alpaca my bags.

I recently heard about a cross eyed circumsizer, unfortunately he got the sack.

All I got for Xmas was a deck of sticky playing cards, I am having a hard time dealing with this.

Too late extended with Dragons.

I went to my doctor yesterday and he told me I had to stop masturbating, I asked him why and he said because I am trying to examine you.

My wife complains that I continually push her buttons, I tell her that I am simply looking for the mute.

Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep in.

I bought a chameleon the other day but it wouldn't change colour, turns out it has reptile dysfunction.

I bought a wig for 25 cents yesterday, it was a small price toupee.

I bought a $120 belt yesterday, my wife said it was a huge waste.

My wife told me of a kidnapping today at our local school, luckily the teacher was eventually able to wake the kid up.

A starving Irishman and Englishman enter a bakery and the Englishman steals 3 buns and puts them in his pocket. When they are both outside the Englishman brags what guile and skill he displayed as the owner didn't see him steal the buns. The Irishman states he can get 3 buns honestly without...

In frustration I told my wife to embrace her mistakes, she gave me a hug.

I'm writing a book on reverse psychology, please don't buy it.